I'm going to make a second attempt to get into the fire brigade at work. I tried a year ago, when I weighed 269 and I was just beginning in firefighting. The guy that runs the brigade made some excuse about too many office people, and then promptly started 17 people (NOT including me) through training.
Now I'm 50 pounds lighter. I've got a year of experience and 75+ calls under my belt. I'm in the best shape I've been in in 10 years and darnit! I'm going to try again.
I am SO freakin nervous! I dread getting the No that isn't a No like I got last time. I dread getting a No straight out, and I also dread getting a Yes!
If I actually get in, my life is going to get harder again. A whole new group of guys to work with. More time doing physically hard things. If I don't get in, then it will be the death of that dream. And if he doesn't give me an answer like last time, then I'll be in limbo until I figure out it really meant No. Urgh.
But there's something in me that wants to try again. So I will. Wish me luck.
You can do this, for sure! With the 50 pound loss has also come a lot of strength and determination and confidence, all of which will help with getting onto the brigade. Good luck!!!
ReplyDeleteI love folks with gumption. Maybe because I sabotage myself so often, out of fear of failure. But last year, I decided to get over those neuroses and do things I was afraid to do or had failed at before--like weight loss, like organization, like finishing my novel (which several editors wanted to see after reading those first chapters). I really do still have a cowering kid inside, some days, but the kid has to grow up, or I'll be old and die with a host of regrets. Enough with regrets.
ReplyDeleteYou, yes, do it. All that can happen is a no. But you might get a yes. It's worth a shot for that yes, right? I'm behind you, cheering you , and thinking of you as an all-out damn heroine!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Your chances look much better this time with the weight loss, experience gained, and commitment to the group. I think it's awesome that you are going to try again. So many times we give up to easily just because we've been told no. We need to be more like a kid who is told no but doesn't stop asking till they get what they want.
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